Fan Words: "Message to the guy who made his own luck"

By Mara Vanessa

Chuck and his classical B.C Rich

Chuck Schuldiner died when I was a 14 years old teenager. The day before my birthday, there were the attacks of September 11th. Even living in another country, I don’t need to mention that the whole world felt the pain and grief of the United States during that period. Families were destroyed and innocent people lost their lives ... Echoes can be minimized by time, but NEVER forgotten.

Going back to 2001, I can still remember how I learned of the death of Chuck. I was at school, in the last year before going to high school. At that time, just me and Igor (my big friend from school) liked and listened Heavy Metal. We exchanged magazines, CDs, buttons ... In fact, we were living in the 1980s in the 2000s. Well, on December 15, 2001, I was finishing my math test, while Igor (two series earlier) hit my shoulder and said, "Mara, I think today we will not be able to talk. I'm not feeling nice." I asked why and he, very reluctantly, said: "Chuck Schuldiner died two days ago.”

To highlight the importance of this statement, I have to go back to my 12 years old, when I heard Individual Thought Patterns for the first time. Incredible! It seemed the world had no more room for another kind of music! Some Americans guys managed to express in lyrics and songs what I was looking for. Wow, the riffs and guitar solos seemed to have its own life and I felt them talking by themselves. I needed to know more about a band called Death. Some older friends already went with the logo emblazoned on T-shirts and always quoting a guy named 'Chuck' in composing his own music, then, should be something good.

I went to the first newsstand I found and I perfectly remember of asking the newsagent: 'Could you please give me any magazine that has a band called Death on the cover. "He replied:" Dea what, my daughter? "Even with the communication a bit confused, I didn’t leave that place without an issue of Brazilian magazine Roadie Crew. Inside, there was and article about the Control Denied (but hey, it's not the Death ... But it’s name is also in the text? I will find out!). And so, I discovered that Control Denied was the other band of the guitarist and vocalist Chuck Schuldiner (Wow, this is the same guy of Death) and it was working with this kind of music now.

I returned to the newsstand two weeks later and I ran into some old magazines, previous issues, which the owner of the newsstand decided to sell at very low price because he didn’t want to accumulate it. In the midst of many old numbers, I found an edition of Brazilian magazine Metalhead who had a huge poster of Chuck Schuldiner. I immediately brought it home. And that's how the Death, Control Denied and Chuck came into my life. Beside teen idols (yes, I also had), I reserved a bigger and increasing space for that musician who looked so nice and who has achieved, in a short time, to become a legend.

Working a lot!

To me, for a long time, he was a legend! At that December 15, 2001, when Igor told me that he had lost his battle with cancer, I realized that two big tears dropped from my eyes. To my naive mind, I believed they would do a sort of magic potion and they were already giving him. Chuck would not die, it couldn’t happen. He lived in a developed country and someone would fix it. But there are things of the destiny of which we don’t know and cannot understand. Chuck has gone.

I got home and kept all my stuff (CDs, magazines, shirts and posters of Death) in my boxes which were decorated with ribbons and butterflies (I still have them) and promised that his death would not be forgotten, as happened with others great talents around world. I remembered of having read something about the struggle of his mother, Mrs Jane Schuldiner, and how she remained active and supporting her child. That was decisive for me. So I decided to continue researching and improving my knowledge more about the work of this musician.

Almost nine years passed until today, when I’m almost completing my studies in Journalism. Only now I felt safe enough to contact his family and the faithful sitekeepers of the Empty Words, Kees and Yvonne, to request an interview about Chuck. I looked for musicians and friends of Chuck and also tried fans - sincere and loyal fans, who are scattered around the world and make this admiration much more than create a myth, and yes, believe in the strength of the talent of a man. The article was released in the biggest newspaper of my town and was very well received by everyone. It was a gift!

Good son, brother, uncle, friend and musician.

Now, almost twelve years after I "met" Chuck Schuldiner, how was called the youngest son of Mrs Jane, I know that he was not a myth or semi-god. He was (and through the memories, still is) a regular guy, who had fears and dreams that may seem a lot like mine, like yours, like everyone’s. I have to stop here because I feel I'm losing all my rationality and being completely ridden by emotions. It's hard to talk about it, no matter how much time passed.

I dedicate this to all Schuldiner family members (especially Mrs. Jane, Beth and Chris): thanks for sharing the son, brother and uncle with us. Eric Greif ex-manager of Death and eternal friend Chuck, thanks for the tireless work. Yvonne and Kees, remain strong. You are the differential in this relationship idol-fan. And fans around the world (including myself): We are all one big family. Thanks!